thoughts on...

Motherhood: I had to go through a caesarian delivery because the baby is too big for my pelvis. This freed me from prolonged and harder labor and saved my baby from distress. Now I see a vertical, dark scar on my belly but I bear this with pride – this is what a mother’s courage look like!

Baby: a captivating being who makes life better, drains my stress and when she displays her cherubic smile, she instantly gets us wrapped around her little fingers

Pure Pleasure: the smell of my baby’s skin, looking at my baby’s face and seeing how she resembles me, hugging my husband, the touch of my baby’s little palm and fingers on my face

Perfect day: a day spent with my husband and baby! It’s perfect when you’re with the person you love. Everything else is just icing on the cake. It helps to be on a beautiful beach but if I find myself in stuck in traffic, waiting for a ride or lining up in the grocery (fantastic times of bonding yata to), I couldn’t care less as long as my husband is with me.

Turning 30: I welcome another chapter in my life. I feel good about myself for having really lived my 20’s – tough experiences and choices, major decisions in life, life changing events – work, marriage and motherhood!

Best Moment: my bridal walk, wearing my best smile …and seeing my husband with tears welling in his eyes as he waits for me at the altar; seeing my newborn baby for the first time

Marriage: a blessed life and relationship, generates a feeling of being generously blessed and truly loved! A great marriage is a lifetime struggle. For me as a wife it means, prioritizing our dates, understanding his weaknesses and faults, accepting our differences, going the extra mile to express my love, thinking together, leading him closer to God. Marriage is where God’s best blessings dwell, this I truly believe. With this, we are able to overcome hardships, cope with child rearing challenges, communicate well, and even have fun and spontaneous good times together.

Words of wisdom: love your family. Let’s celebrate our family every single day – while the moment still matters, while the time still counts

mommy's birthday wishes for abbie!

my dear darling abbie,

The whole family celebrates your birthday today. Everyone is so happy and excited. Daddy and mommy decided to celebrate it with Jollibee! Relatives, friends, mga ninong at ninang came to greet you a Happy Happy Birthday. Syempre we are so proud of you. Look at you now… so beautiful, healthy and loveable baby! We were amazed to see you smiling at everyone. For us, it means that you truly appreciate your party.

Abbie, you are the greatest gift I have received from God. This means God blessed me with a child because I am worthy to become a “mother”. And you know what, I will give my best and devote my life to prove myself worthy of God’s trust. I pray that I may be guided so I can be a good mother to you.

Here are my birthday wishes for you baby ko:

1. For you to be healthy and strong. Nothing beats the “good feeling” whenever I see you actively playing, laughing out loud, or sleeping well! I hate the bad cough and colds that give you discomfort. You know I was super concerned of your health when you were inside my tummy. I ate lots of fruits and veggies, no softdrinks, tea and coffee, no chichiria, no tocino, hotdog because of their preservatives, no swets - chocolates and cakes. I took my vitamins diligently with the help of your daddy. All these and more give me enough reason why I should be equally concerned with what you will be eating and drinking now that you are 1. I really hope you will like eating fruits and vegetables.

2. For you to be surrounded with love. This love would definitely come from daddy and me, and the whole family. You are so loved and everyone in the family is so fond of you. Ang dami nag-aalaga syo, si granny na lagi mong kasama, si papa at mama na laging lumuluwas sa Manila para makita at maalagaan ka, si tata na lagi kang ginigising, tito boo na lagi kang nililipad “fly baby fly”, si ninang osh nalagi kang kinakarga at marami pang iba tulad ng mga ninang at ninong na cute na cute syo! - I know you feel the wonderful, big LOVE surrounding you and I pray that this will make you feel you are special! While we make sure we provide for your needs as you grow, we will also be concerned with the more important things like time, attention, care and understanding.
3. For you to grow reflecting to others the love you received through being cheerful, gentle in words, kind, generous, and loving. If I would be asked to write my dreams for you, then this would most likely consist the biggest part of it. God entrusted us with a life that is YOU and I would like to be worthy of the trust by leading you to His path, helping you become a good person - “mabuti, responsable at mapagmahal na tao”.

These are my wishes for you and I know I am guided by the spirit as I write them down. That’s the reason why I feel confident that these wishes are blessed and will always be remembered by God.

Happy birthday abbietot, i love you very much! mwaaaahhhhh!

mommy

happiness creates radiance!

August 10, 2007

a closer peek!

August 7, 2007
Current Mood: Excited, hopeful, loved!

unveiled... it's a baby girl! our baby has been making a lot of movements these days! I feel like the baby is learning how to swim in different strokes inside my tummy! Sometimes it feels quite strange and uncomfortable but I love to feel the movements. Each movement tells me "I am here mommy, alive and healthy!" it's truly amazing!

August 3, 2007 - we went to Asian Hospital for the 4D ultrasound. We made an early appointment with Dra. De Jesus. I had to drink a lot of water in preparation for this.

needing a breakthrough

July 12, 2007
Current Mood: Heavy and sleepy

It's been a month since my last post. Well I've been through a lot for the past weeks. I just proved that life still puts you on a series of ups and downs regardless of your sensitive condition. Yes I am pregnant but this doesn't exempt me from experiencing stress, bustles and nuisance! I don't want to mention them one by one because that would only make me feel less OK. The most important thing for now is that I've successfully turned the situation into something good. All is well and I know that in everything that comes my way, a lot of effort is needed to compose myself, ease off and decisively control my temper! I realized I need to remain calm most of the time because the tension affects my baby! The baby's movements become rapid and strong whenever I feel uneasy and furious. I am most concerned of this. I should try my best to react positively. This post a great challenge for me. I am not used to being naive or unaffected. I am very passionate with things that concern my family and work. But I should learn to prioritize concerns. Our baby should come first! I put my best efforts to keep this life within me safe, strong and healthy - physically, emotionally, spiritually! There are no trade offs when it comes to this. I think this resolves most of the concerns that bother me.

By the way, the sex of the baby still remains as a big surprise. The result of the ultrasound last month did not reveal it because the baby's thighs are covering the thing between!

sharing my thoughts

June 6, 2007
My Current Mood: Relieved

It was last year when I made an important decision in my life. I decided to marry Bil and start a family with him. I let go of other things and focused my energy on this goal. I believe this is the decision that supports my highest values, and will make me the happiest both now and in the future. I feel that more fulfillment and joy await me.

Being 22 weeks pregnant, I still don’t know how it feels to be a mom. Probably I don’t spend much time thinking over or imagining what it’s like. But I am sure that this little life inside me will change my life and give me joy in ways I could never imagine!

Responsible parenthood seems to be the most challenging word for me nowadays! While I admit the fact that there is no school that offers a course on effective parenting, no formal trainings are provided to prepare parents to be before they assume such great responsibility, I am still confident that with an open heart and mind, one can measure up to the challenge.

I may have a little background on this – being a psychology grad, having practiced the profession for a number of years in the school setting, having attended varied seminars on parenting, having read books, and most importantly, being a witness of the ways my own parents reared me. These are not enough but I am taking my time, savoring the days as it unfolds inch by inch the multifaceted world of parenthood.

chilling out with colds

June 1, 2007
My current mood: mellow, sick & worried

It’s hard to feel this way – sick and uncomfortable. For five days now, I have suffered from colds. Now I have terrible sore throat. I can barely tolerate the pain. I cannot take any medication because it might affect the baby. I am also thinking that my condition is somehow affecting my little one inside. I hope to get well soon. I’ll be resting for the whole weekend. Vitamin C, Centrum, fruit juices, lots of water, fruits seem not enough because for five days I did not feel any improvement at all. I pray to Jesus to please take away this virus. I pray that my baby will be protected.